If you work for a media company long enough, you'll find that sometimes overuse or abuse of certain words or phrases necessitates an internal ban. There are no comments. All rights reserved. In text land, apostrophes have become endangered species. But she isnt, so shes calling you friend because she wants to JUST BE FRIENDS. Additionally, she may ask when you can talk with her next time or when you are free. In a piece for the New Statesman last year, writer Amelia Tait explains that men have more room to appear unenthusiastic than women do. Drop them altogether, and those very same may people read you as cold and remote or even angry. Building on Hiatts (1977) and Scates (1981) work, Rubin and Greene (1992) expected that sentence types such as exclamations would be among the likely candidates (1992, p. 15) to differentiate female and male prose in their study of college students writing. In the second one, *without the period, it feels much more open-ended * -- I'm heading out to the party now but who knows what I'm doing later, and you just might be part of it. *prize may be substituted for firm handshake or one turn at claw game. First, even though email is extensively used, it still lacks universally agreed modes of behavior established by generations of use (Crystal, 2001, p. 15) and precise means for conveying exactly the impressions the email sender wishes to convey. It's hard to say for sure. A couple texts that seem off arent always a red flag, but if it becomes consistent, its worth addressing with your partner. In other results that are consistent with what Herring (1994) observed in female-predominant electronic discussion lists, there were only two challenges, one from a female and one from a male (Answer that one, why doncha! and Id like to talk to those who think running DE is cheap!). Explanation of difference: Multi-sentence messages dont typically cause miscommunication, but the real culprits" are short sentences or single-word replies,McCulloch says. When considered in relation to gender, however, exclamation points are often described as markers of excitability, a phrase that implies instability and emotional randomness. Now we have to look at 140 to 160 characters -- and with less raw data to work with, our overanalyzing hits a whole different level of insanity. If a girl is into you, shell make it known by asking what youre up to this weekend, etc. As a guy, this is the first time I have heard of this. The results (Chi square = 3.438, df = 1, p=.0637) suggest that a larger sample would be needed in order to better evaluate this relationship, but that the trend is in the direction of males using excitable exclamations more often than females use them. (1996) in their study of 27 online electronic discussion groups consist of straightforward content codes that provided a range of objective alternatives to the more subjective descriptor excitability marker. At the same time, when exclamations assigned to a given code (such as Flame2) consistently expressed either positive or negative emotionality, the code could be acknowledged as indicating excitability.. I found the answer I'd long suspected in a study cited by The Cut for its piece, "The Internet Talks Like a Woman." When a girl takes the extra mile to text with the correct punctuation, it may mean that she loves to do things right even on relationships. Then it's just kind of odd.). I've also heard good things about that Katherine Heigl movie Falling in Love Is Neat* either way, meet you there at 8? It shows how each piece of research built on its predecessors, further developing the notion that exclamation points function as markers of excitability. If you one of them, then you may want to know what are the signs she likes you through text. Theyll use the ellipsis only to add a meaning to their message. Exclamation points are typically reported to be used by females significantly more than by males ( Colley & Todd, 2002; Rubin & Greene, 1992; Scates, 1981; Winn & Rubin, 2001 ). And thats the least zany thing about it. Ask her out on a date and dont be afraid to communicate in real life. hope it helps. I do it for you"; "Joe + Susan. January 1998. A text that says, Id love to see you. Texting truly is an art form. Well, enough of that. Any ratio higher than one emoticon per one hundred texts is pure poison. You might find yourself paying extra close attention to your appearance, or censoring everything you say to make sure youre conveying your feelings well. It was wonderful of you to say thatthank you so very much! just because she doesnt want you to think that she is rude. And that gender-based style extended to exclamation points too! I'm not sure if this is a sign of attraction or anything. It can either mean excitement and eagerness, but sometimes it can also mean desperation and anger, depending on how it is used and the circumstances. (, Rafaeli, S., Sudweeks, F., Konstan, J., & Mabry, E. (, Savicki, V., Lingenfelter, D., & Kelley, M. (, Appendix Subscribership of dig_ref and JESSE as of November, 2004, Participation Rates in dig_ref and JESSE by Gender. You can even take it a step further and name the title of the film in your text. Specificity is a good sign that youre on their mind. According to a2006 study, women use exclamation points in their emails significantly more than men in an effort to appear friendlier. It shows youre lower on the totem pole than a better option with someone else.), Stuck at work. Girls are emotional creature. It seems like shes interested in you when shes receptive to your text. Lets look at it another way! I dont have one of those sunny dispositions that inspire musicals. (Or, on the Internet, your.). If the exclamation point applies to the sentence as a whole, then place it at the very end. 1. ;) Should we continue where we left off? This seems to be an open-ended conversation, which means the girl you are texting is still interested in having your communication going. When used properly, a single exclamation point can set a light tone,. ", If you use the plus sign in lieu of the word "and" or an ampersand, it's your subconscious telling you that you really like the person. If someone uses a lot of exclamation marks, it might be because they are trying to flirt. Either way, you sound like a catch to me. Content was analyzed to determine such elements as sentence type, syntax, use of figurative language, and approaches to topics, but some elements, such as exclamations, were simply counted. Support Black Women by Shopping These 28 Amazing Brands, Sam Levinson Thought She Wanted to Be an EntrepreneurThen Her Business "Failed", Dreaming Of Being a Digital Nomad? The way you use an exclamation point can change your dating life. In his first book, 11 Points Guide to Hooking Up, comedy writer Sam Greenspan offers tips for handling dating sites, Facebook Walls and other potentially dating pitfalls of the modern world. (1996), some from dig_ref and JESSE, and some were created by the author. NewJoshuaPls 4 yr. ago. Is Your Anxiety Sabotaging YourRelationship? This study was limited to a sample of 200 exclamations that were posted to the library and information science electronic discussion groups dig_ref and JESSE, the latter being the subject of one of the few existing studies of gender and computer-mediated communication in library and information science (Sierpe, 2000). Copyright Thank you! After completing her Masters Degree in Library Science, she became the director of Pettee Memorial Library in Wilmington, Vermont. No, I don't use them that much and if I do then it's for a reason. Share your thoughts on this pesky punctuation in the comments section. Exclamation points are used to give emphasis to a sentence or word group. Buzz60s Sean Dowling has more. The world is flat! When couples carve their names into trees, they use a plus sign between them. Asterisk. Some messages contained more than one exclamation; each exclamation was treated as a separate unit of analysis. Full disclosure: I already looked at the menu and know what I want to order., Can I get back to you? (This text is rather lame because it doesnt even indicate if theyll be getting back to you in a few minutes, a few hours, or a few days, says Spira. Meaning: It depends on how many question marks you use. Not sure if we're going but I might see you at the party. Keeping in mind Mills caution that linguistic elements should not simply be presumed to indicate factors such as deference, power, [or emotional stateCW], that it is necessary to analyze the multiple possible uses of each element (1999, p. 27), the study then presents a 16-category coding frame as an alternative to the previous method of tallying up exclamation points and characterizing them exclusively as excitability markers. When you ask if shed like to get drinks sometime, its easier for her to say yes to some vague plans in the distant future. Sample response: I have no idea what my schedule is like this week, life is soOOOooOo crazy!!!! Keep up with Maya on Twitter and Website. For example, He was the one who taught me that f***ng game. Either way, they're looking at the current romantic situation very, very logically. Sometimes stating the obvious is exactly what you need to do. Only 19 (9.5%) of the total of 200 exclamations examined indicated excitability, i.e., negative or positive emotionality. It has to be interesting for her to know what you are doing, what you like to eat, what films you watch, what you did today. Tip: Use semicolons to join two main clauses. Im checking the search engine now! Remember that girls like self-confident men! Guess what, youre in trouble. My hair is getting gray! Hiatts computerized tallies indicated that the occurrence of exclamation points is greater in mens prose than in womens prose, i.e., that women writers as a group do not exclaim more often than the men (1977, p. 44). After rising from the dead, the theater subscription service is back with a convoluted new business model. It furthers the University's objective of excellence in research, scholarship, and education by publishing worldwide, This PDF is available to Subscribers Only. What time do you want to meet up???? [deleted] 4 yr. ago. You've been added to our list and will hear from us soon. Do you maybe want to grab a drink with me on Friday? It conveys the message that she over edited the message, but this is much less nerve-wracking than the condition when a girl uses lots of exclamation points. At the time this study was conducted, JESSE subscribership was 1,154. Each exclamation and the entire message in which it appeared was stored in a database record that also included the first name and gender of the poster and a means of identifying and retrieving the message (e.g., a message number or a posting date) should that be required. Interestingly, the independent raters assignments were exactly the same as the authors. Use them a lot, and people think you're girlish and cute, unprofessional and too friendly. Like one of the women Tait talks to in her piece, I worry that using too many exclamation points makes me sound like a breathless valley girl instead of a capable, confident woman.. Are you free to go to a movie on Friday night? is a clear indicator they not only want to get together, but they have a plan in mind, says Spira. Of the 19 excitable exclamations, 10 were made by females and nine were made by males. Instead of using exclamation points as they were intended -- to convey a strong or forceful feeling -- girls have turned them into virtual velvet gloves, using them to soften all of our. To revist this article, visit My Profile, then View saved stories. Finally, females made 53% of all emotional statements (as defined above), compared to 47% by males. Use them too much and youre deemed unprofessional. The findings are summarized below. At the time this study was conducted, dig_ref subscribership was 2,500. Meaning: You want to bring the conversation to life. Taxes and shipping calculated at checkout. A semicolon in a text message is the equivalent of putting on makeup to go to the gym. Intended statement of fact, whether or not the fact is correct; opinion stated as fact. Meaning: You pay attention to the little things. Join us for must-read career inspiration and insights into the future of work, every day. But when I make the swap in writing, I feel like I sound aggressive and cold. The breakthroughs and innovations that we uncover lead to new ways of thinking, new connections, and new industries. It can come across as sort of a heartlessly chipper," McCulloch says, "even if cheer may have been called for in our previous lives.". Cycles back to playful. That said, consistent, unenthusiastic texts probably mean something is up. For example, John sent a message to a girl and got a reply like John! In this case, the sender or the girl is glad that John remembers her. You've been added to our list and will hear from us soon. One exclamation point means she's trying to be polite and interested or enthusiastic. The semicolon is usually used by writers in composing literary pieces and not in day to day text messages. If someone takes too long to reply, you might think theyre not interested. In an ideal world, women wouldnt have to bend themselves into shapes to make other people feel comfortable, but unfortunately were not there yet. I'd rather see a romantic comedy. To younger texters: An exclamation point might feel like a tool indicating politeness. Participation was determined by the gender of the name of the poster of individual messages, and messages posted by each gender were counted. ")}else if (texts 6. A co-worker of mine confessed to being an exclamation-point abuser (as am I) but she argued there was no other choice, especially given how many work emails she has to send ("I don't want to sound like a bitch!"). Only you can compare the enthusiasm in their texts at the beginning of your relationship to what they look like now. +1 y. It's a safer punctuation mark because it doesn't carry multiple meanings. Giving a new twist to the study of student compositions, Winn and Rubin (2001) investigated ways in which gender identity is enacted in the written language of personal ads. Too many and you look immature. Noting that questions posted to JESSE were not of a type that usually lead to heated debate, Sierpe wondered whether this absence of passionate debate was the result of a different value system and one that permeates all LIS-related electronic discussions lists or is a particular feature of JESSE (2000, p. 287). Im a generally happy person, but if you were to ask my friends and family to describe me, the word cheerful wouldnt be in the mix. Only 11 exclamations in the Flame 1 category (mild argument/annoyance) were made, eight by females and four by males. Both the original ProjectH coding frame and an adapted coding frame used by Savicki, et al. I use exclamation points a lot as well, but I didn't think it was girly. You can also use ellipses in a positive way, to get the person's imagination going: Had maybe a few too many drinks last night legs are sore from dancing in the bathtub right now That text takes three statements and just loads them with sexual undertones thanks to the ellipses. Self-disclosure, preferences using I or my.. When a girl does use a punctuation mark, there . Everything may quickly die down even if a girl was interested in you at the beginning of your communication. Or she may not answer at all. Girl Uses Lots of Exclamation Points: What Does That Mean? We have several recommendations with the help of which you can understand (at least in general terms) whether your interlocutor is interested in you or not. You up for being my date?, Should I make a reservation at that restaurant we talked about? If you leave, let me know! Sam Greenspan is the creator of 11Points.com and author of, Trouble Hooking Up? 1. The good news: When you understand the reasoning behind the grammar in a text from someone from who has a different relationship with technology (and typically is of a different generation), you can better avoid miscommunication. Everything You Should Know About the New MoviePass. In texting, you don't have to end a sentence with any punctuation. Looks like a typo. If they respond too quickly, is it because they happen to be by their phone and arent into playing games, or is it because youre showing signs of being too interested and needy? How to Know If a Girl Likes You Through Texting? In addition, each rater assigned a gender code F or M (a U was also available for unknown, but was not needed) to the first name of each message poster. Like. Texting removes the vocal cues we once used to overanalyze if someone liked us. On the other hand, computer space is cheap, McCulloch says. Use of this site constitutes acceptance of our User Agreement and Privacy Policy and Cookie Statement and Your California Privacy Rights. What does it mean when a girl uses exclamation marks in texts? Tag questions, for example, are usually understood by grammarians to invite verification, confirmation, or consent, and by some linguists (e.g., Brown & Levinson, 1987), to function as politeness devices. When you start overusing exclamation points, you look like an amateur: Sounds good! Girls use it more because they are more excitable, they want to share their feelings, and their excessive use dampens it's effect. Instead of using exclamation points as they were intended -- to convey a strong or forceful feeling -- girls have turned them into virtual velvet gloves, using them to soften all of our everyday utterances. The period in the example "Sounds good." The gender of the writer of each exclamation was also recorded, with gender being determined by the message writers first name. (Er, sorry.). A complete list of the content codes adapted for this study, along with definitions and examples for each code, is provided in Table 2. This lampooning of theunspoken requirement that weadorn digital communication with cutesy emojis will be familiar to many, especially millennial women. Carol Waseleski, Gender and the Use of Exclamation Points in Computer-Mediated Communication: An Analysis of Exclamations Posted to Two Electronic Discussion Lists, Journal of Computer-Mediated Communication, Volume 11, Issue 4, 1 July 2006, Pages 10121024, https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1083-6101.2006.00305.x. . your dreams. >It's always better to play it cool than to play it like a 12-year-old writing YouTube comments. Future studies might address these limitations by comparing exclamations posted in electronic discussion lists associated with feminized professions to exclamations posted in lists associated with other, non-feminized professions. So asterisks imply that you don't think that person likes it raw, like you (and ODB). Sample conversation: Guy: Hey, hows your week going? Texting truly is an art form. That means you're trying too hard, and there's nothing worse than trying too hard. (, however, isstill fair game.). For older persons, it simply means okay, but for those born in the 1990s, it may mean they are really pissed and they dont really care about you anymore. Girl: Mines great so far, hows yours? The. It can either mean excitement and eagerness, but sometimes it can also mean desperation and anger, depending on how it is used and the circumstances. When Rebecca Blaine Carton worked in an all-women office, she came to realize how necessary emojis and friendly punctuation have become for basic communication. While females posted 73% of the exclamations and males posted only 27%, participation rates in the two electronic discussion groups must also be factored into the analysis. and of course, cant wait!! A comparison of subscribership and messages posted in dig_ref and JESSE is presented in Table 1. To get a taste of what Greenspan, creator of the 11 Points website, has to offer, check out this excerpt from his book on the secret meanings of punctuation in text messages. Further research should also address whether the use of exclamation points alters perceptions of, say, friendliness in email environments. In this case, her affection is obvious. Exclamation points are the most abused piece of punctuation in our world today. ! are peppered throughout my outbox. Content codes such as QUESTION and STATUS (titles and words that identify the personal status of the message poster) were not relevant for this study and were not included. Our hearts will go on"; "Logan + Madison. The Meaning of Other Punctuations Girls Use. What does it mean if a girl uses exclamation points? Lately, the exclamation point has been a point of contention amid the COVID-19 pandemic. But its a fine line between enthusiastic and unprofessional. The first sample consisted of the 607 messages from dig_ref and the 1,077 messages from JESSE that were used to retrieve the 200 exclamations used for this study. Combined participation rates for both groups averaged 62% female and 38% male in both the original sample of 607 messages from dig_ref and 1,077 messages from JESSE and in the larger sample of 1,400 messages from each group. Our free, fast, and fun briefing on the global economy, delivered every weekday morning. Carol Waseleski was a graduate student in an online Library and Information Science program at Southern Connecticut State University when this research was begun. Girls like to say things in a not-so-direct ways. 0 Reply. A Chi square analysis was also attempted for use of friendly exclamations. Yes, the whole language. Given the claim that use of exclamation points is a feature of female discourse style (Colley & Todd, 2002; Rubin & Greene, 1992; Scates, 1981; Winn & Rubin, 2001), dig_ref and JESSE seemed likely settings in which to locate exclamations. Heres Your Guide to Remote Work Visas. Like Rubin and Greene (1992), Winn and Rubin counted markers of excitability, but did not analyze the context in which they appeared for a possible range of meaning. The results show that exclamation points function most often to indicate friendliness and to emphasize intended statements of fact, but only infrequently as markers of excitability. A Chi square analysis was performed using excitable exclamation rates (53% female and 47% male) as observed frequencies and participation rates (62% female and 38% male) as expected frequencies. Duplicates (individuals subscribed under more than one email address), Total subscribership as of November, 2004, Number of messages posted by subscribers with female first names, Number of messages posted by subscribers with male first names, Total number of messages with gender-identified names, Number of messages posted by subscribers whose first names could not be identified as female or male, Copyright 2023 International Communication Association. Sign up to receive tips on work, life, and how to chase (and reach!) Simple, unassuming, and friendly. This isnt to say that using emojis is inherently bad or anti-feminist. For example, if you . 2023 Viacom International Inc. All Rights Reserved. OK, calm down! The present study begins by examining a body of research relating gender and the use of exclamation points. In general, we dont advise you to delay real meetings and correspond too long. The notion that exclamation points function as markers of excitability can be traced in modern times to The Way Women Write, Mary Hiatts (1977) study of women and mens writing styles. Unfortunately, not everyone feels comfortable taking that approach and might resort to ghosting or disinterest in texts instead. Plus, Michelle McSweeney, a researcher and linguist, detailed some of the most common miscommunications in early relationships. Ultimately, this video showsthe importance of being just as intentional when communicating digitally as face-to-face. If someones losing interest, Spira says their texts will probably look a little something like this: A lack of follow-through over text is typically sign that your relationship is in trouble. Both men and women overthink every text, Spira tells Elite Daily. I have a bmw 323i,red exclamation point light is on in dashboard,not sure what is means misplaced my service book,but i think it means low tire pressu; If a guy sends you exclamation marks in text mark, what does it mean? But be careful. Examples of content codes include ACTION (meaning action or call for action by the individual posting the message, e.g., Read e-books!); APOLOGY (implied apology such as I wish I hadnt said that! also direct apology, i.e., Sorry!); COALITION (agreement with or support of those in the group or elsewhere), and FACT (facts whether correct or not; also, opinions stated as fact). When used properly, a single exclamation point can set a light tone, convey excitement, and even demonstrate interest. This is especially true when you're trying to impress someone or win them over . So Ill definitely throw in an exclamation point or three in those situations.