So i dig a little deeper, and she feels as though lately shes been put into more of a teacher role with me when it comes to emotional connection and prioritizing self-care, not to mention cooking. (Which was true). Please help, my girlfriend asked for space cos we havent seen each other for 10 months but we communicate well even though I do most of the conversation We appreciate your support! My girl had feelings for someone else and when I found out she begged me to stay. But dont know what to do? She Does Not Listen to Your Stories She might give you the Uh-huh and not engage in conversation with you. Hope this helps. Meaning using the bank and such. Refocus on yourself and falling in love with yourself. Shes still been spending time with friends, going out with her friends etc and we have not had any argument at all.. she said she only broke up with her ex boyfriend a couple of weeks before first seeing me so needs time to figure herself out and Space to work on herself.. Foolishly I fought that because Im so in love with her. Im personally having a hard time with this, just with her being 23 hours away and me not being able to help her. A woman typically takes you for granted if she is always asking for space, especially when you are too available. The next day she says she isnt sure how she feels it isnt the best time for her she says she needs to focus on herself. She tells me she loves me but not have once asked for space. So the day of, my friend tells me she asked if it was ok if i went and my interests sister said it wasnt; my interest had said she needed her space right now; i wasnt mad or anything. Two weeks later she said she was taking a step back. Hope this helps! What should I really do now in the meantime? She also mentioned She also said that. Registered User I asked her if she was breaking up with me and she said no. I dont want to text her that often as I fear she might see me as an annoyance. (am so tempted to buy her Xmas gift and ask for an outing to see a movie). I was in a relationship for 7 yes and we had 2 kids together. She also asked me if I would be friends were her so I can see the dog because recently we just got a dog. Apparently I didnt make any effort with them and about 2 months ago we started to not get on as well and were at each other more than normal. She came back and told me that she still doesnt think getting back together would be good, and said she came home because she doesnt really have anywhere else to go and because she doesnt want any bad blood between us. She stated she needed time to refocus. Thanks in advance :/, Hey AD, thank you for taking the time to read When She Says She Needs Space. its hard given her space I have been dating this amazing woman for 6 months. Lately, I have been a mess. But with my situation of still technically not fully separated and hers I feel like there is nowhere to go. These fights would always affect my ex and I but we always made it work. Where is this relationship going? We did and she said I need to focus on other things etc. I have reliased that I should give her the break she is asking and focus on myself. some space. Hello i have been with my girlfriend 1year now and she is been hurting from her ex boyfriend after that shes been dating gorls until she knows me after that we been in a great relationship we talk everyday and always told she doesnt want me to breakup with her now after 1 year we did have a problem and asked for break i ask her to forget i talk with many friends i did go to see her even ahe didnt want to now she bloked me from all social media and follow two guys on Instagram that i bloked because they want her she is so cold with me and even dont care i think please help i feel really because iv been faithful to her and never ever did something bad to her pls help sos. During the relationship, the families would often argue over rituals and cultural things; clothing and venue etc. Thank you for your comment. If you need more coaching I would suggest booking a private coaching session. I also ask her deeply the other reason why she needs break. We argue all the time. Yes, I hate admitting it but Ive been toxic without even knowing. I knew she felt the same as I did. Web362K likes, 1,644 comments - Minnie Mills (@minnie.mills) on Instagram: "First and foremost, I want to say thank you to Shayla. is 10 minutes away and shes always taking care his family members. Ive always been the nice guy , I acted weak, on situations in which I should have been strong, and it seems she have lost her attraction to me. Coincidentally this was the same day we had plans to go to an event together. I hope youre doing great , i want to thank you first for all the work and advises you share with us ,you are truly a blessing. Afterwards we were still good and would talk. If youre basing your self-esteem or validation on someone else, theyre going to feel pressured. Thank you for your blogs and videos, they really are great insight and super helpful to us idiot guys! I am so glad you enjoyed the articles! What do i do, i really like this girl and i wanna help her by being the best boyfriend i can be. Apollonia. Unless this is what you truly want? Im having a tough time with it because obviously I feel like Im losing her.. and its scary. She has since initiated texts asking how I am and Ive asked her about some future dates we had booked in. I told her all these things mentioned were all things that she had told me she was ok with given the fact it was all really her ideas and thoughts I told her that I was not happy with all this and confronted her a little before I decided to leave her place even though she said to me that she still loves me and that she doesnt know what to do and feels like she regrets saying these things to me and said maybe she just needs time because these were on her mind for a while even though we only recently booked our tickets to go on vacation last week. This is the only way that you can dissect the relationship to see what you might have done wrong and how you can overcome this so you can support your partner now through positive actions and change. When she says she needs space, maybe she wants to find her individuality again. When we get into a relationship or if we get involved with someone, we may be unsure of whether theyre a match for us, or maybe were suffering from something thats going on in our lives right now. Thats a tough situation but this weeks podcast could definitely give you some clarity: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/write-your-legend/id1456127373?i=1000489100388 The reason for why she needs some time i asked her she said i m adjusting and compromising the things bcz of her in my life which she says you dont need to compromise or adjust. My name is Apollonia Ponti. She said no and that if she did she would be honest. Today is the day we met for the first time and i feel so helpless. And said that she has given me so many chances and tried to express her feelings about our relationship and our intimacy and said I dont take it serious or dont understand it. Her cousin is basically triggering those feelings back. You can book a coaching call using this link, But doesnt want to regret whatever decision she decides to make. She then tells me that she doesnt think theres any hope for us and says it has nothing to do with the other guy. The next day she apologized but I said its ok that she had every reason but still now became distant. Im 34 with a 12yr old. I have a question me and my wife been together for 15 years Married for 6 years I caught her having a emotional affair with a ex that is locked up for 40 years and I put her out after I put her out there was no contact for a few days because she was calling me and I was ignoring her so she came knocking on our door I let her in and we was talking and she said she was trying to fix the relationship we going on our third week now she havent came back home but she calls 6 to 7 times every day and we have a 16 month daughter she said she was doing what she was doing because she felt I was treating her bed and she said she wanted me to feel her pain and I dont understand where she coming from with this I know we had a problem because when my daughter was born I am a truck driver and I went to go sleep in the other room and we agreed today and I will come in on the weekends but I continue to stay in the other room and I Houma another bargain and she got mad with me NFL does do I was lying to her and I didnt want to come in a room with her and this one on a half until Ive caught her on the phone talking to the guy from jail so now she act like she not in no Harry to cone back home talking about she dont feel comfortable But since this happened she have been over to stay the night three times has sex with her once so how you dont feel comfortable if you to been over and slept with me in the bed with nothing in that time and now I am to the point where I am tired of playing this game I told her the other day either she come back home and we go to marriage counseling and try to fix this or were not because when I told it is its like she never responded she danced around what I was saying and then we supposed to go out this week so I dont understand what she doing at this point and right now I just feel like i am ready to cut off all contact and deal with her mother far as my daughter just dont understand her angle right now if you dont want to be married why keep calling 5 to 7 times a day checking up on me and get mad if I dont answer when she call, Hey Devonta. Start your social life. Can I win her back or have I lost her for good? is this what she really want she asking. I love her more than anyone Ive ever been with. she told me she wanna leave me please I beg you leave me alone. etc. Sometimes, a girl needs space when she is overwhelmed by too many things, such as a lot of college or work assignments. Get involved in activities to meet people and go to the gym etc. She texted me the next morning good morning and texted me later that day telling her about her daughters teeth. With mothers day around the corner and her birthday, should I buy her flowers or completely stay away and let her initiate the call. AND SHOW ME She also brought up religion again and said how she doesnt want me to all of a sudden become a Christian and for me to be Christian just to be with her. But then, I read your letter again and I think about you some more and suddenly I see, that for all your acceptance, what you arent accepting is I would book a private coaching session if you need more help, but youve got this. Youve got this. But she cannot leave her job now, it is really important for her. Best. Everything was happening naturally and just falling into place. Do not call her. If you have shown her that you can be a good provider, a kind listener, and a partner who lovingly wants to support her in her life, and she doesnt recognize how good you would be for her in her life, then shes too bloody stupid to be wasting your time with. I know I need to calm down, but my only concern is I am unsure how to handle the future, let her call/text first (things she doesnt really do) or in a few weeks time send her a casual message about something that reminded me of her and play it off as a chance to be curious about her and how she is doing? With that said, I have a girlfriend right now which I truly love with all my heart. Avoid catastrophizing the situation and respect her. Do I wait until she reaches out to me? . I then told her that if she needs anything let me know Im here for her is you want to talk about anything. with all this said we do have some indifferences which we debated on a few occasions such as medical values to having a vaccine for the current Covid virus which Im currently not comfortable to take due to my medical conditions. Just nice an easy and see where it goes, or do i push against the door a little to see what might be behind it? And finally we met, and she want space, she talked a lot about my mistake at all once. 12-Week Transformational Attraction Coaching w/Apollonia, NOW ACCEPTING JANUARY 2023 Enrollments . You have to show up differently. It has been 2 months since that incident. Youve shown her you only remove her from your life for a couple of days. Ive also decided to stop posting on Instagram as well to fully not contact her. Divorce was only used one time thats the day we fought. Apollonias team. Should I not go to the same community run any more? Dont spend another second on this imbecile, move on and you will find a woman who sees your goodness and will appreciate you in her lifeand ultimately love you. Finally, the following Saturday was the first time we hadnt spoken during our entire relationship. Best. I have these negative thoughts about her not wanting to be with me anymore, or there being someone else in the picture but I know neither of these are true remembering the great times weve had and the emotions weve shared; also Im almost positive there isnt someone else in the picture, because she MADE time for me, shes very busy and driven and she decided that I could be in her life. Right now i really do not know what to do, I found also a flat to move in order not to stay in a flat that is full of memories. The biggest advice that I can give you, and this is truly important, is to focus on YOU right now. A bit of the back story is that we were pretty good for a couple of years, my parents are divorcing ever since November and my sister has been going through a bad time ever since Christmas. Which caused our communications issues and lead to this but there was no fighting, rarely any disagreements. Hi Thomas, Hi there, Iv e started counseling for myself. I have done all I can do as of now to show her that I do appreciate her and how sorry I was that I let our relationship slide when I was the one at fault because I let drinking get in the way and I am doing everything I can ( quiting drinking, read the book and seeing a relationship counselor ). I will text her and see if she is willing to at least give me a good closure and know their is no chance of getting back together. We started out as friends with benefits, but she ended up developing feelings for me and then I did shortly after. Im sorry that you are going through this as I know its incredibly difficult. 1 week passed by and she messaged me and we talked for 2 days straight and now were not currently speaking as maybe she went back to her space and I just found out recently that she deactivated her facebook account ONLY but kept the messenger open. The right people stay in my life and I am always protected is a great one) https://www.apolloniaponti.co/neediness-seminar-nai i was tried to manipulate her mind control, Hello Curtis, Do I just wait for the weekend? She wanted things to be discreet. Now Ive reflected upon myself, I saw my faults, I blamed the world for our lack of time to see each other when I was the one that chose this job and chose to date her, I have to find the balance, and further I started training again, fixing my woodwork machine, Ive doing a lot and I feel so much more happier, confident and just amazing, yet we still talked, and then I told her last night, after she said that she still doesnt feel ready to see me, that maybe we should not talk at all, cause I was the knife and by talking to me were just opening the wound and not healing it, she felt like she didnt want to break all contact, but Im trying to break it. What do you think? I shushed my sister, after brunch me and my girlfriend went to the beach we had a good week, come Friday afternoon she told me wanted time for herself, and blocked me, I asked why but she seemed really bothered. Would love to know your thoughts I just want to know Im doing the right thing because I obviously made ALL the wrong decisions previously. She thought that was the best idea and might work. Best, Instead, i gave in to her request. I would recommend you connecting with one of our coaches, even for some emails back and forth on the topic so you guys can unpack the situation and get some solid advice from a professional. Do not text her. She asked me she wants space, and probably she will stay with her parents for a few weeks. But i still want to know the terms and conditions of the space, like how long? On our date we talk about everything. I am more than happy to help. She always told me that she cares for me, appreciates me, loves me and we talked about the possibility of moving together. ), then she went from spending a day or two back at her place to we need a break for a week or two. She still checking my stories. I know this can be hard but a woman that loves you does not want to lose you break or no break. Due to the high volume of comments we get, its a little difficult to give you solid advice through the comment section. You question me so much and its like youre my father! Although her ex was overly caring and loving her, he was constantly pestering her and pressuring her into things which she really couldnt take it anymore.